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Poetry by Is That Latin
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Join us for this new Bible Study: The Hazards of Being a
The deceased is clothed in a diving wet suit,
a face mask which has a single vent
for breathing.
The normocephalic head is covered by brown hair.
There is frontal balding.
A rubberized head mask having an opening
for the mouth and eyes.
He was a senior pastor at
The irises are brown. The conjunctive and sclerae are filled
with gas and markedly suffused.
Our Creator filled Brother Gary with a zeal for life and ministry.
A second rubberized suit with suspenders,
rubberized male underwear.
The nose is unremarkable.
He passionately pursued God daily
as he walked through his days loving his wife,
his church and the Great Commission of our faith.
Hands and feet have diving gloves and slippers.
The ears are unremarkable.
for all the investments he had made
in the lives of so many people
and so many different ministries.
There are numerous straps and cords
restraining the deceased.
The neck is unremarkable.
The ultimate honor was reserved for our God
who worked so wonderfully
through
There is a leather belt around the midriff.
The chest is unremarkable.
There is a series of ligatures extending
from the hands to the feet.
“He always seemed like a very nice man.”
The abdomen is unremarkable.
The hands are bound behind the back.
“Does anyone know his wife's name?”
The genitalia are normal adult male external genitalia.
The feet are tied to the hands.
The upper extremities are unremarkable.
There are nylon ligatures holding these in place
with leather straps about the wrists and ankles.
“They are distraught yet finding
that God's grace is indeed sufficient.”
The lower extremities are unremarkable.
There are plastic cords also tied
about the hands and feet
with a single plastic cord extending up to the head
and surrounding the lower neck.
“I Praise the Lord for His goodness, mercy and grace.”
The back and anus are unremarkable.
“How do people survive this existence without Him?”
There is a dildo in the anus covered with a condom.
The prostate gland displays areas
of focal hemorrhage on its posterior surface.
Clothing present: The deceased was received wearing
two (2) wet suits,
one scuba diving mask,
one pair of diving gloves
one pair of slippers,
one pair of rubber underwear,
two (2) ties, five (5) belts, eleven (11) straps.
Our church asks the media and community
to be respectful to the facts of the event.
Evidence: Blood, head hair, pubic hair, fingerprints,
and a bloodstain card are obtained.
We respectfully ask the media and public
to respect the privacy of the family
and the church at this time.
Personal effects: One yellow metal ring intact on left ring finger,
one dildo.
Counselors will be available.
Swabs and smears obtained of the mouth and anus.
We will begin the healing process
under the strong arms
of our Savior, Jesus Christ.
Sources
The Smoking Gun.com
Autopsy Report
http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2007/1008072scuba1.html
Montgomery
http://www.montgomeryadvertiser.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070915/NEWS01/709150320/1007/rss02
Thorington Road Baptist Church
http://www.thoringtonroadbaptist.org/mensbiblestudy07.htm
Our Church Grieves
Church Statement
http://64.233.169.104/search?q=cache:IRq9NxnhAK0J:thoringtonroadbaptist.org/GMAPress_062507.htm+Rev.+Gary+Aldridge+Thorington+Road+Baptist+Church&hl=en&ct=clnk&cd=1&gl=us&client=firefox-a
The Fighting Fundamental Forums
http://www.fundamentalforums.com/showthread.php?p=540856
2 comments:
Well . . . THAT was certainly disturbing! The world's most embarrassing death.
Exceptional! It really grabbed me, and the fact that it's true, with cites, yet - very well done!
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